I'm getting all the prep work done tearing into the comic book art. Since I had the single frames I imported it into a single Flash file. Whew, I had to republish the thing about three times to get it right. Added a back button. Deleted someout of place frames and added some frames that were misnamed. I think it's ready for primetime now
JunkYardSplit
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
Wow! That is very impressive! It was fun and funny. It looks like it took a lot of work.
I accidentally closed my browser just before the end so I had to click quickly through all of the frames... it was pretty cool to look at that way... your drawings were so clear that the action read well even at that speed.
That was a tremendous effort... I look forward to seeing some more!
EL!
It is really, really good. I was little skeptical about the two dog/robot premise--well, I was equal parts skeptical and intrigued--but the characters are really good, esp. the way you drew them. It had a nice pace to it, and the expostion of the dogs before the junk arrives was good. The pacing, the build up throughout was all good--really good!
I honestly want to see more--and with your exlnt storyboards to guide me, it was practically like watching an actual cartoon! It cries out to be animated!
I felt it could have ended with the limo flying off the first time.
The last seq fighting over the money is good, tho' I felt least comfortable with the cliche of the big sack of gold. Maybe it would be funny if the payout was far more modest, like one dollar, or a roll of pennies--or something really odd, like a bag of sunflower seeds--seeing them fight over low stakes would be funny, too, I think. I like the final scene of parting out the coins, and this could be applied to smaller stakes. The real good part of the whole last sequence is their intial harmony after getting the gold; this suprising show of unity that reminds us THEY WERE ONCE ONE DOG.
Also the ninja seq is very funny, but the specific ninja costumes and "nun-chux" strike me as too derivative--I can also see how most people would find this seq. the highlight. I'm just (too) tough on these things. I feel like you could comee up with a similar crescendo, but with more Ellis-like originality.
Really funny dialogue. Really funny drawings. As it went on I liked it more and more; I think any reservations about the "gimmick" of a split dog fades as the two dogs emerge as such distinct characters. Also, reservations about the setting (future world) (which let's agree, we've all seen many times before), were blunted by your nice realization (good tow truck design). I do worry that this setting is so overdone it hurts your chances of appearing original enough.
I love you.
WORD.
Great feedback. Rick, I like to speed click through it and see it as a cartoon myself. Marty, good notes. At the end it needs to be clearer they are sorting each others parts, one for you one for me, and then I rip of Foghorn Leghorn/Chuck Jones," luckily I keep my parts numbered for just such an emergency". I'm definitely going to be slowing down and changing much about the comic book version. Especially slowing down to get a good character design. So things like cliched ninjas etc can certainly be addressed as I come to it. I was thinking about tracing up but I've decided so much of it needs improvement, it would be best to do fresh redrawing. I was in a huge rush to make the deadline for Frederator pitches and basically this art is a hectic weekend.
Dude, it looks great. They are bloody fools if they don't demand you accept their money to produce this. I'll drop everything and come work for you as a personal assistant. And I'll keep my opinions to myself.
ALSO: for the pitches, did you produce some "model sheets," or other, more finished art to augment the great boards?
Marty, the greatest flaw of my package was listening to the Frederator people and neglect a character sheet. They claimed they are completely board centric in terms of reaction to pitches. But I know that the minds eye can be heavily influenced by spiffey character design.
I'm reading Billion Dolar Brain right now and even though there is no physical description of the character/narrator, I see Michael Caine as Harry Palmer. That's my minds eye at work from my first exposure to the story as a movie.
This does look like a load of work ... what's the next step in creating it as a graphic novel? Continuing to define the action and broaden it out so there's more flow to the visual narrative? Or is it to a stage where once feedback is integrated you'll just start "drawrin' pages?"
Tom,
It won't be a graphic novel. It'll make about a 30 page comic book. I'm doing it for a few reasons. 1.The story is completely mapped out.2. I want to get a small enterprise going in indy publishing. 3.I want to do a big stylistically unified piece that looks like something contemporary like Invader Zim or something by Ben Caldwell. and 4. It makes for an easy to use piece for another pitch go around. It will be a lot of work. Must start now.
Post a Comment