Monday, March 14, 2011

Crits please - but no "little people" jokes


Heyas,

So I'm adding some sci-fi elements to my portfolio..

Which, Dear Mr. or Ms. Future Employer, can be found at www.dokwhitson.com

And I wondered if honest crits would tell me not to bother fixing this one up (lots of messes here and there to clean)?

And btw TAGers, any and all crits on that website would be really appreciated as well.


ok
Dok

8 comments:

MrGoodson2 said...

Hey! Dok, long time no post.
I dig it. I think you should play with some spot colorize or overlay layers that drop some color on the gray engine area. It's a little cut in half with the color right now.
And contrawise maybe another adjustment layer and play with de-saturate on some of the color in the front.
I like the mecha.
What are you going to look for Dok?
And how recent have you got unemployed?

MrGoodson2 said...

Your main webpage looks great. You go out amongst them well armed.

Rickart said...

I dig this a lot! I think it's pretty cool and this drawing works as a clear guide for someone to build it from. Hardware is one of my big weaknesses, so I admire folks who can do it well.

Suggestions:
I'd like to see a version with a person sitting on it to insure that a figure looks right on it, that the distances between the seat, the foot pads and the joy stick are all correct. I might be tempted to ding it up a bit, and put some grease marks on the exposed engine parts. Some of the engine parts could be made of different colored metals, too. Numbers, logos, safety instructions, etc. as stickers on the body of the vehicle are all good details to add as well.

Tom Carroll said...

I think that along with Rick's ideas for decals, labels, numbers and such, some of the silvery motor section cries out for tubing, clamps, and other stuff from Kragen Auto Parts. Even taking a few bits of what's there already and making them have a different surface type (shinier, scuffed up, etc.) will make it seem more believable. Great Web site, Dok. As one who was made redundant and who is now in transformation mode, my thoughts/prayers are with you.

Tom Moon said...

Hey Dok, the midget racer looks great and I have nothing to add to the already excellent suggestions.

One small problem I did have while looking at your web site was this: At some point during the viewing the "Dok" menu retreated out of sight, but there was a message on screen that said," Please select a category of concept art from the list on the left." I was puzzled and I thought, "What list on the left?" I figured it out after about 15 seconds.

The interface is very stylish, but I always prefer there to be such standard buttons at "Home", "Main Menu", "Prev", "Next" prominent on the screen at all times so I never have any doubt where in the tree I am and I never feel lost.

In an effort to maximize the area for the artwork the >,<,i,"play" and x buttons are tiny-tiny and hard to work. You've also de-emphasized the explanatory text. It's small, and gray-on-black.

I think the text is important as it gives a real-world-work context to the piece which I would want to know about as an employer.

Dok said...

You guys are the best!

These comments are truly helpful and they made me decide to take this piece to final. Hope to have that done by morning, and I'll post it again.

Regards the website - thanks too for those thoughts. Some, maybe most of the items raised are hard coded in the template I used from Picaholic.

But I'll see if there are any work arounds. About half of my respondents went out of their way to praise the navigation.. and the other half had problems with it. Which means it needs fixing. There are four other templates that are available to me, I'll see if converting to them helps.

Thanks again good people!

MrGoodson2 said...

Another quick note. Desaturate the whole thing. You already have it on a black field. Invert it then so you get a quick silhouette. That may suggest directions you want to take it.

Davis Chino said...

Dok, it's so good to see you on this site!

Jeez, I think it looks way cool the way it is!

I never know how far potential employers want to see their concept work pushed...what I like is that the shapes and proportions seem really clear. And it does seem like a midget racer.

I like the fact that it could go toward a more cartoon-y universe, or something more straight-ahead sci-fi. Maybe some of these comments reflect the desire to see it go more one way or the other.

(Fer instance, I could see it happily gliding through one of Rick's fantasy/future worlds--OR I could see it in one of Ellis's edgy dystopias)

And hey! Did you see my post a few months back about you?!? I think you need to look seriously at a career as a furniture designer....

Hope you are well. Great seeing yr stuff on here. And hey, we've even got Ron Thompson posting from time to time!